The heartbroken often struggles to be at peace with self, feeling turned inside out, each fragment of time seeming frozen and the person finding no good reasons to live. In these times of depression you need a few words of apt counseling more than ever. Healing a broken heart takes time. However, one thing you need to remember throughout is that eventually you will start feeling like yourself again. In this article, you can expect to know about a few tips and words of wisdom distilled from experiences of others who were once there, where you are now. In this age of social networking, when photos of you and your ex in happier times remain glued to your Facebook page, coping up with this whole mess is harder. We agree that breaking up is never easy, but there are ways to make it more bearable. You have to come through this stronger. Wondering how that can ever happen? Read on:
1. Accept the Truth
You don’t need to read a lot of stuff to understand this simple method: You need to accept what happened. Believe that it was God’s wish to unfold things the way they did, if that helps. Define your real intentions early on. Do you want to move past the breakup, or do you hope to get back with your ex? You cannot move on unless you have accepted the relationship is over.
2. Gather Courage
Know that this, too, shall pass. And know this will take time. Gathering the willpower to move on is all it takes. You might feel weak at times. However, rising strong will help you emerge as a new and a better person that you were earlier.
3. It’s OK to be Sad
Allow yourself to express your anger and sorrow. Do not try to hold in to your emotional anguish. Understand the emotions that you are feeling are normal and embrace them. Studies reveal that expressing emotions reduces the body’s stress response.
4. Stop Stalking
Don’t get stuck in situations that may make you regret it later. Making lots of phone calls or emailing nonstop would not help you let go of the past. Get rid of any music, photos or gifts that remind you of your ex. De-clutter your virtual reality too. Remove and untag photos of your ex from your social networking sites. Also, going through your ex’s social networking profiles or any other account whose details are with you is not going to help either.
5. Don’t Lose Hope
Whenever you get involved in a relationship, you know there is a risk. Don’t let a bad experience keep you from living your life to the fullest. The choice is always yours- you can go through life looking back and repenting or missing, or enjoying the finest things of life. You have to learn to trust again.
6. Stay Away from Negative Thoughts
Deal aptly with negative thoughts. Listening to your favorite, feel-good tunes can trigger the release of endorphins, lifting your spirits up and relieving of stress. Eat dark chocolate. Dark chocolate is said to evoke feeling of joy. Go out with your friends, speak your heart out and let them worry about carrying you back drunk. Meditation helps too.
7. Enjoy Your Singlehood
No rebounds. Do not rush into a new relationship. You may date and have fun but be wary when it comes to letting someone into your heart again. Enjoy your own company. Go away on holiday. Plan a break from your routine life. A change of scenery may do you some good.
8. Stay Away From your Ex
There is no being friends. Until the time comes when you don’t have any feelings for your ex, forget about being friends with your ex. Expect that your ex may call or text you and want to get back together, perhaps out of loneliness. But ask yourself and decide beforehand if this is really what you want, or if you are ready to move on.
9. Spend Time with Friends and Family
Grab onto the ones close to you. Do not underestimate a good friend or family support. Enjoy spending time with the people who are still in your life. Take off from work and plan a long holiday with your family. Visit your cousins you haven’t seen in years. Remembering good old days is the best healing solution one can have.
10. Do Things You Always Wanted to
Try to engage in activities you love, something that has been a long time hobby or may be something you always wanted to do but never found the time to. Go for a long, fun-filled vacation with family or adventurous trip.
11. Buy Clothes, Expensive Watch, A new Bike
Kill your pain with materialistic happiness. Pull out your wallet, get money from mom, borrow some from father. Buy a Rayban sunglass, a Rado watch, or lots of Armani trousers.
12. Work it out
Join a gym, play basketball, try kabaddi, take swimming lessons. Getting sweaty helps take your mind off your ex. Try to keep a regular schedule as best as you can. Sleep, eat and drink well. Mind and body reciprocate each other. To help your distressed mind, you should therefore take hold of your body to gather yourself.
13. Do Charity
Doing something for others naturally takes away the pain of self. Feeding a hungry child, distributing clothes to needy, or doing something that makes you feel worthy is all you need to shift your focus.
14. Take Help
Consider seeking a mental health professional if you need help with your broken heart. It is nothing to be ever ashamed of. Professional deals with such cases on a regular basis and can help you come out of the depression.
15. Move On
Join a dating website if you feel it is time to move on and you do not have an iota of doubt about what you want from here on. Even though you are not ready for a serious relationship, causal dating won’t harm.
Last but not the least, your loss can, no doubt be undone, but let this ordeal serve as a message from the higher consciousness to you to learn from the experience and be a guiding light for times to come. Have faith and remember, tough times never last but tough people do.